yet another money guzzler

for september, the month that has recently been promoted to my favourite, i decided to fix up a film camera we had knocking around, as my sister stole my dslr for a road trip to croatia. i couldn't have an empty camera shaped hole in me, so here are the pictures of my life this month. 

and if anyone's at all interested, here's some non-photo related things. i've just started at college - basically a huge place that consists of awkward conversation after awkward conversation after awkward conversation until you finally find someone who you enjoy talking to. and also on the buses you're basically a sardine in a tin (yeah these metaphor's are seriously deteriorating*) - i've barely had a chance to sit on a seat. and (i'm limiting this to my last and because i can sense this turning into a blog of moans) of course there's the daily morning 'WHAT THE FUCK DO I WEAR' panic. that's really fun. 

on the plus side, my fears a couple blogs back, as far as i know, i needn't of had. i'm actually getting on with mr ex boyf rather well, and though i don't think much will come out of it, he seems to feel the same as me loveydoveypleasedon'tgetanewgirlfriend-wise. i've met some lovely down to earth people, and i still see my favourite people on a pretty much hourly basis. so it's all good in the hood.

with the new laptop n' all i've lost a shedload of music, so it's been jolly fun discovering new music and rediscovering old. the libertines were a pleasant surprise to hear, and both the new sufjan steven's ep and arcade fire album are gorgeous. wafting through old photo's has been nostalgic too.

and i'm trying to promote this to complete strangers, no-one familiar, so this is the perfect place - 

my singy youtube

and while we're on nerdy topics

my tumblr

my last fm

phewf! bonne nuit

bonsoir monde

this evening i uploaded my first ever video to the you tube. as my social life dwindles my technological life is buzzin off the roof. watch me yodel and strum RIGHT HERE! oooh it's all ever so 'citing. 

i've inhabited my sisters room this evening, so i can milk tunes out of her speakers udders (how's that for a metaphor) as she is currently on a rally to croatia dressed as the cast of the life aquatic (have a gander).

this is my personal favourite:

fully clothed i float away

so today i went for an epic shop, and came home £130 worse for wear (or better, hopefully? good one molly) oh and if you peek to the left you'll see i also discovered a marvelous website called laphotocabine.com, which i've been vainly enjoying for the past half hour. AND finally acquired the new, or not so new nowadays, wolf parade album. lovely. though that doesn't sound all that eventful, there's a lot going on right now. tomorrow's my induction day at college, and i start properly on the following wednesday. i'd be lying if i said i wasn't having a 'nervy b'. it's a bit of an odd prospect being plunged into a huge group of people, most of who i won't have a clue who they are, after 5 - and in some cases 12 - years of the same faces every day. i was going to go into a huge metaphor about unblocking toilets then but thought the better of it. ANYWAY that part should be easy enough to get used to, people are fun. the part that is most bothering me is monsieur ex boyf's brand new selection.. and that this will most likely be the point we both call it quits for good. i knew it was inevitable he was going to find someone else he liked, or preferred or whatever, soon enough, and that 'the healthy thing for us both to do now is mooooove onnnnnnnn', blah blah blah, hear it every two mins from mothers and the like. we're not bloody cows. but yeah i know they're all right. i just know who's going to be quicker at the whole moving on thing, cos even though i hear everyone telling me it's the right thing to do, i don't believe it, but unfortunately (for me) he does. my whole gay teenage girly little fantasy of us going through college together like a less divorced version of katie price and peter andre has gone down the drain. the divorce was always going to come. ah well, at least my tv show doesn't have to be taken off the air.
i only got thinking about this today because on the train journey home from shopping we had to sit in the quiet carriage, shock horror for the little girl with the big mouth, moi. so i shoved in an earphone and ever so conveniently all the songs i used to listen to in tears on the train home from his humble abode after a horrible argument or break up and contemplate pathetically 'WHAT AM I DOING' came up on shuffle. i refuse to say what they are, they're all far too humiliating (lets just say that natasha bedingfield  is a high contender for the teary top spot and leave it at that). i got that deja vu, then realised that i'll most likely never be staring wistfully out train windows wishing i was somewhere else again because of him. and i'd really like to know why that saddens me. perhaps it has finally sunk in he won't be there to make me sad anymore, he doesn't have that power, and the sad part is, him making me sad and making happy go hand in hand. i can't have one without the other. i'm not ready to forget each other just yet.

ha, i started typing this with the vow that i would devote only a few sentences to gay ex girlfriendy moans. bugger. okay to make up for it, have a nice big slobbery drool over my new shoes:

come back

you left before i found myself

few miles down the road

i've heard that i live in a tiny place, but to me it seems endless. 

most mornings i step out the door and look over the garden wall and see something i haven't seen before. the days are usually dreary, so i never feel much need to photograph. 

today the sun came out, and we took a trip to one of my favourite areas to change that. i'm starting to think that if i ever crossed seas from this 'tiny' place, i'd probably have a heart attack. 

however this won't be happening anytime soon - i just found myself sat alone in an indian takeaway, barely even hungry, and £10 lighter. i'm either appalling at saving money, or just a plain chubba (a phrase my friends and i have adopted to address the occasional fat flab) with a craving for vindaloo.

welcome to falmouth

while i'm here..

here i am. here's some rather old photo's of me (and some other  things i've made chucked in too)

post birthday madness

today i came to two realisations. the first is that all humans under the age of 5 are drunk. honestly, the next time you're on a train with a baby that could rip through your ear drums, or sitting on a bench and watching a toddler dismantle a sausage whilst talking to itself about the contents of the sausage, take a minute to compare it to yourself in a time of upmost drunkenness. 


the second is that i'm scared of everything. for all of you spinsters struggling to find an alternative to watching repeats of come dine with me, here's my list:
1. vom/vomming/getting a whiff of vom
2. spiders
3. having msn post 30 years old
4. wasps. bees. most things with wings
5. jack nicholson
6. having my stomach pumped, after watching almost famous
7. texas
8. jackass
9. cleaning my room
10. eastenders, coronation street, emmerdale, and recently to the collection, hollyoaks
11. trago mills
12. never getting married and owning cats
13. using binoculars to perve on birds, then i've officially become my mother
14. my old biology teacher
15. on a more serious note.. anything severely bad happening to my sister
16. being alone for long periods of time
17. being inside for long periods of time
18. shoot me for being vain, but becoming fat
19. sharks
20. injections
21. infections
22. wrong directions
22. hospitals 
23. giving birth 
24. dying
25. polystyrene
26. choking on runner beans
27. being rolled up in a rug (and most forms of claustrophobia)
28. myspace. i was addicted to the point where i spoke in bulletins
29. my rabbit. i swear to blog (thought i'd slip in a juno quote there) it whispers my name when it's angry
30. my ceiling collapsing. wouldn't that be fun


and many more.
before i dash, just thought i'd mention my sister just called me from reading festival, and played lisztomania live by phoenix down the phone. woah nelly